As many of you watched on ESPN2, the ChopStar Nation had its live online draft last night. First, I want to thank the two Nationers that made the trek out to Brooklyn to partake in all the food I slaved over for the last two days, all in anticipation for the draft. A well fed Nation, is a blood thirsty fantasy football drafting Nation, as the old adage goes.
Kira Henehan and Christopher Swetala were the only NYC based Nationers that made it out to our newly remodeled ChopStar Nation HQ (thank you Charlie Rengal), and for that they will always be near and dear to my heart. Farooq Ahmed, Sara Gilley, Colin Delaney, and Ryan Murphy -- you are all fucking dead to me. These four Nationers live with in spitting distance of the ChopStar Nation HQ, and all four knew about the live online draft 40 days in advance -- 40 MOTHERFUCKING DAYS -- and yet all four were unable to make the trek, even after I enticed them with chicken wings and pulled pork sandwiches. What more do you people want? You are dead to me. Not as dead to me as that cocksucking Billy Cueto, who will burn forever in hellfire for betraying us. He is uber-dead. You four are sort-a-dead. Let's leave it at that.
The rest of you Nationers are excused for missing the festivities here in NYC, as you all live too far away to have made it practical for you to have been here. Your punishment will be your having to live in other places other than NYC. Suckers. You are all not even close to dead to me.
HERE are all your draft results. Enjoy.
On CNN this morning there was a 45 minute discussion, among experts of varying degrees of expertise, about your own CSNFFLC's choice in taking Jay Cutler for his starting quarterback. The Buck Nasty is, admittedly, a little weak in the old QB department. Will Ben "Sex Offender" Roethlisberger mitigate this Cutlerization of the Nasty? Time will tell.
"BILLY CUETO SUCKS" t-shirts can now be purchased in the ChopStar Nation gift shop. Get yours today.
Week 1 Matchup News soon to follow. Here's a little taste: The Buck Nasty is coming to motherfucking KILL TheGreenpointAttack! no matter who's their quarterback. That's a lock.
E. Tyler Lindvall
CSNFFLC
6 comments:
If I'm sorta dead, does that qualify as undead?
I'd really like to be undead...
Also, I forgot to leave a link to my blog, killthechildren:
http://killthechildren.blogspot.com/
I heard the best part of the night was the blue cheese dressing. Who was the culinary genius behind that recipe? Is she hot?
Brett Favre? Jacobs? You told me the draft was fair
Gordon, don't fret, you have McNabb as your back up QB...oh wait, that's not so good either. Don't think of your quarterbacking crew as old, think of them, much like yourself, as being wise. Jacobs is unfortunate, but your starting RBs are beasts. So, quit your crying. I told you should have used yahoos ranking tool to remove players that you definitely didn't want...you know, guys like Favre, McNabb, Jacobs.
It's Fantasy Football, baby. Anything can happen. Favre really might be a gunslinger this year.
At least you don't have Cutler. I don't know what I was thinking.
So, it looks like all my hopes for this season rest on Philadelphia. As such, if I win the league, cheesesteaks for everyone.
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