Thursday, August 29, 2013

Pre-Draft Post for all True Believers

Hello Nation.  We here at the Nation HQ are busy trying out some Mock Drafts, seeing just where Tebow falls this year.  Not as soon as you'd think, as it turns out.  That being said, there will be little to know doubt that our fearless GodHearts the ole Sackbags will pick him much earlier than expected.  Round 2?

So it goes.

This year's draft is quickly coming up on us.  This Sunday at 4 in the p.m. if you happen to live in the Central Time Zone, to be exact.  If you don't live in the Central Time Zone, I can only imagine that the draft will be at some other time.  You should verify those sort of things with you and yours.

Best of luck to all of you in this year's draft, and the season to come.  I have great expectations for all us in the Nation.  I would at some point in the near or far future like to get us all together for a group photo, you know, for posterity.  People will look back, long after this blog is over, football is banned for its utter brutality, and the lot of us will just be heads floating in jars with our minds hardwired into some motherboard out in space.  Won't it be fun to see just what we looked way back when?  I really can't wait.

Anyway, that's what we've been up to.

See you on the wild interwebs Sunday afternoon.

Yours,

ETL
CSNFFLC

Thursday, August 15, 2013

ChopStar Nation 2013 -- The New Beginning

Here it comes, Nation.  Here it comes.  The 2013 season is just around the corner, and I, for one, couldn't be happier.  The sun is starting to shine just a little bit brighter.  The air seems to be getting cleaner (could Fantasy Football be the solution to this pesky Global Warming everyone seems to be talking about?).  My sleep is deeper as I dream of fantastic 100 yard rushing days from my RB2 and multiple 60 yard field goals from my kicker.  These are FACTS!

Check out or draft order (randomly assigned...I swear...no really, it is completely random):

1. Muslim Sisterhood
2. The Warriors
3. Thunderhorses
4. Marshall
5. The Mayhem!
6. TheFightingFighters
7. The Ex Presidents
8. God Hearts Sackbags
9. TheGreenpointAttack
10. The Buck Nasty
11. The SwineFlu
12. Brew City Bombers

So get to doing some mock drafts so you can know what the fuck you are doing come Draft Day.  Mock drafts can be found HERE.

Note:  the Gillemonsters are gone but not forgotten.  Just kidding.  They are forgotten.  God Hearts SackBags and TheGreenpointAttack weren't smart enough to get out when the getting was good, so they are back for another year.  Hopefully these two won't be as complacent as they were in 2012, hunting for bucket fulls of losses and bushels of heartache.  They are not gone but are still just as forgotten.  But, who knows, maybe 2013 can be the year for one of these two floundering franchises.  One never knows, does one?

Now is the time for us to welcome our newest ChopStar Nationer -- Eric Peterson.  Eric is more often than not called Pete, which has nothing to do with his last name and everything to do with his gigantic penis, which is called The Master Peter by his wife and one of his two mistresses.  The other mistress simple calls it The Devastator.  MORE FACTS!  Pete hails from somewhere in the middle of nowhere Illinois and now lives in Chicago.  That's all you need to know:  big penis and now living in Chicago is our coach of The Ex Presidents.  We welcome him with open arms.  And now after that short love fest, we all must get very busy in destroying his team, slowly killing his spirit throughout the year, one win at a time.  That's what we do.  Bees buzz, birds sing, Nationers come to PLAY.  Hang in there, Pete.  You are in for a bumpy ride.  But you couldn't be in better company.

Live Draft date is Sunday, September 1, 2013 at 5:00 in the p.m. Eastern Time.  Chili (with MEAT in honor of Pete) will be served at the ChopStar Nation headquarters, so if you're in the Chicagoland area that weekend, stop on by and get your grub on before you draft your team.  Fun times. 

Looking forward to, at the very least, not being second to last this year.  Let's GET IT ON!

Cheers,

ETL
CSNFFLC